Whispers in the Dark

I watched as Anna climbed up on Toby's back again. Wasn't easy gettin' that 'bot dog down here into Hemlock. She was thrilled no end. "Seems like I could almost hear the sounds of Lily's diggin' in the mines. I'd gone down there to see her...... Got a gorram shock to see her too. She'd changed....." I rubbed my face then looked back up at Anna as she giggled, "There she was, small like a kid. Wirey and all wild. I caught her scent. That I know didn't change. But she was now no more'n a child her own self now." Wasn't goin' to admit how it tore me up inside. "Now Lily was a whole new entity. Not my Lily, not the Lily we all knew. Some little feral child."

"She don't really know me or anyone, 'cept maybe Xoxo... And that's questionable at best too. I had to take AuroraBlue with me. No way could Lily handle another jolt. It might foul up what remained of her original programmin'. I think if Lily were in my position, she'da done the same. Keepin' Anna safe was the most important thing right now. But for how long could I protect my little one. I knew the 'laince'd be after me b'fore too much longer. I couldn't very well take her on the run. It's why I came back to Hale's. I had an obligation and a promise to keep." Anna was tuggin' on Toby's collar like it was a set of reins. She giggled and babbled at the old animal 'bot.

"To much goin' on in my head.....And with reaver's on the increase, I wasn't goin' to leave Anna unprotected. We listened sometimes to the distant wails and screams in the darkened Hemlock." I heard em way too well. It brought with it the nightmares from my past......"I woulda gone up to help, but it'd risk Anna and my chances of stayin' hid." That and I needed to keep her away from em. "Xoxo wasn't actin' right either. She'd been actin' more and more strange. We'd got talkin' on stuff. Stuff I already knew. What she didn't know was Lily'd bit me. She was a might unsure how to take that, seein' how Lily's the PAX. I don't mean square. I mean she's been built with PAX. Seems her bite didn't effect me. Didn't change me into a reaver. For whatever reasons...... Don't know. But it got Xoxo a little worried... Saw it in her face."

"She asked me 'bout Kitten... Where all she was. I kept wonderin' too. Where all was mei mei. Not like her to be gone so gorram long and not contact me. I have to let Brooke know she's gone missin'. But gettin' a wave out could be dangerous. I didn't need Brooke in trouble over me makin' a gorram mistake." Started pacin' the floor again. Anna looked up at me with her big blue eyes, "Papa.... Wong?" Lookin' back at her, I didn't know what to tell her, "Nothin', Little one. It's ok. Nothin' wrong." I wish I coulda believed it in my own head. "I could still hear the noises in the dark. The whispers from the past. The sounds of the dead. Whenever I closed my eyes, I heard em."

Lily came down to Hemlock the other day lookin' for somethin'. I was just glad I'd takin' Anna to the bunk room to nap when Lily'd come on down. She was like a small animal. She wanted to know where HAL was. Wanted it for bargainin'.... For what I didn't know. She left when I said it wasn't down here. Barely talk to me. I knew she was not thinkin' of anythin' b'yond the here and now of it. Needed what she needed and then she moved on." Whispers.... Darkness..... Cold and lonely down there. "Darkness was supposed to be quiet. Was supposed to be where you could heart your own heart a beatin'. Instead, it was sounds of ships and people moving above us." Anna'd leaned forward and was huggin' the old dog 'bot. And as usual the old thing kept callin' her Anya. Xoxo couldn't fix that. At least she had a play toy. Not just Dog and me now.

"I'd spotted Lily that other night out playin' in the little playground. Like she always did. But then she went to the department store and stole a big old Sapphire. Hid it in her old worn and dirty coveralls. I woulda stopped her, but what good would it do. I wasn't a deputy anymore.... I'd thrown that by the wayside when I shot the Marshall at Eavestown. She run off after that. Was Lily really gone? Who was this new Lily?" I looked down at the ring a Lily gave me to hold onto. Three tears on a silver band. Whispers of who Lily was. Xoxo was able to remove it when we were trying to save Lily from Ardra. Now it's stuck like glue on me again. But then again I wasn't goin' to leave it there on Xoxo's desk. What was Lily was still in there. Maybe it' was her whispers in the dark that I'd hear when I tried to sleep at night..... when things'd quiet down above us.

Leaky Brainpans

"So there I was, done cleanin' the Aldea's cargo hold. Then Lily finally showed up. But it wasn't her by much. Ardra was makin' her check systems. She wandered on past me to read the equipment. Once Ardra was done with her. she let Lily be herself again. Only then did Lily talk to me. She was becomin' Ardra's personal vehicle and puppet." Me pacin' 'round the Hemlock was startin' to make me feel caged up. "But it wouldn't be for a few days, that I'd found out Aldea was still 'hot'. The doc found me, explainin' Lily told her 'bout it. Lily told her too that I was not talkin' to her. Thing of it is, I wasn't talkin' to her cause of Ardra. Wasn't so much I didn't want to talk to Lily. I did. But when I tried Ardra'd take over and make Lily ignore me. It was a waste to even try. So long as Ardra controlled Lily, it was talkin' to a wall." I clenched my fists just thinkin' of it. I was gorram mad.

I took a mo to brush the curls away from Anna's face as she slept. The only bright side in everthin' goin' on. "Then there was the whole murder thing. Turned out it wasn't that Conan feller. It was Luscious Applemoor. Woman who lived in the upper Apartment over the office. Soon as Gallagher found out, he placed a big ol' wanted poster out. I was bettin' she already left Hale's. When she left, Lily, Bram, and Kitten disappeared. Was worried 'bout the three of em." I kneeled down to kiss my little one on the forehead as she slept peacefully. "A few days later Bram showed up. He said somethin' 'bout workin' on the ship and had trouble." I got back up and started pacin' again. From the couch to the big consoles and screens then back to the couches across the Hemlock's underground base. "Lily was back movin' 'round Hale's, then in orbit doin' what Ardra wanted her to do. So, while I was takin' the gorram treatments for the radiation exposure, Lily was sendin' word via the doc. Lily told her to tell me she was mad and went off and married Bram instead. That got me real riled up. I was ready to go and shoot someone... or mess em up real bad."

When I got back to the couch, I grabbed the old ball that was settin' on the wire spool table. Dog picked up his head waggin' his tail at the thought of playin' fetch.... Again. "That was 'bout the time I got the call from Ziggy. He said he had a job I might want in on. I told him sure. I'd had enough Whiskey to most stuff sound pretty good. What the hell.... It got me away from watchin' my 'verse spin away from me at near light speed. Or watchin' Lily collapse under Ardra's mass. If I could find a way to fix Lily I would, but I didn't know squat 'bout how to fix a genetic construct. Xoxo got hold of me 'bout the same day with some ideas and told me to look for Dr. Qui. Man had a gorram long last name. He had what Mindo needed to fix the mess. A Quantum Bus, or SQUID. Said it would remove Ardra's program and save what was left of Lily's programmin'. I had to head out anyway, so I went to Persephony. Had to meet Ziggy there. No Queen Betty at the docks meant Ziggy wasn't there." I threw the ball against the far wall where it bouced high shooting well over Dog's head as he charged after it.

He leapt up, missin' it, then chased it as it kept bouncin' 'round the floor. "Later, I saw Immy on her horse. You don't forget a horse like that. Nothin' like the roundup ponies they used on the docks for cattle movin'. She had two 'liance people checkin' her ID. I could see the flash of the card from my spot on the roof nearby. The trooper was goin' to hand it back then stopped. That got me thinkin' she might be in trouble. I could take the heat off her and onto me til she had a plan she could work out. I shot at the one in the armor knowin' it'd just push him back and send em scramblin' after me. It worked too. I fianlly had to shoot one of em to slow em down long enough for me to get to the shuttle I came in. Even with the body armor I felt the hits. Even thought I was holed. Didn't want to think of it til I reached Botany Bay. Was sure the 'liance wasn't goin' to show up there. I put a call in to Brooke to let her know where all I was goin' to be. When I landed Svet ended up meetin' me and took me over to the med center."

Dog came trottin' back with the ball all slobbered up. He dropped it at my feet wantin' to play more. I obliged him with another throw. "While Svet checked me over, Brooke, Sentry, and Dylan showed up. Luckily it was bruises and a few hairline cracks in three ribs. Dylan did his healin' stuff to help speed the healin' up. He even threatened to charge me for all the work he's done on me." The yellow Labrador chased the ball down playin' with it b'fore trottin' back with it. "I spent the night on MoonShel. Brooke wanted to keep an eye on me keep me outa trouble. I tried to sleep when I got there.... But I got to thinkin' 'bout Kitten again. Where all was she? It'd occured to me she never even said she was leavin'. That was somethin' she always tried to do. Sort of kept me from worryin'. Somethin' was wrong. I couldn't put a finger to it."

Have you seen this girl?

"Got to thinkin' Brooke might need to know. But then next mornin' no one was 'round. Gallagher was tryin' to contact me. Said he found Dr' Qui and what we needed."

"He picked me up and brought me back to the Hemlock base where we met up with the Dr. We started talkin' 'bout somethin' Krenshar got from the 'liance. The old maiframe. The one I recognized from the old power station. We got to talkin' 'bout Mercedes too. She was involved in the Ardra thing as a kid. She was part of the think tank at the time. Shortly after that, we went lookin' for the mainframe. The thing we'd put Ardra in once she was out of Lily. Ended up we found it in the mountains not far from Destiny." I threw the ball again, watchin' it bounce 'round, and Dog chasin' it happily. "Once we knew where all it was, the three of us went into Blue Sun to connect the SQUID. That and fix the damage Lily caused a week or two ago. Took a bit, but we got the stuff back up and runnin'. But things weren't 'bout to go our way. Lily sent a strange call for help to Seana b'fore cuttin' out. Somethin' 'bout Mindo. Xoxo went searchin' for her and ended up bein' taken by Mindo too. Then I got a call from Mindo.... The ring for Lily." The ring I was still wearin'. It was my link to Lily. Reminded me of her, and how I was literally holdin' what made her, her, in my hands. She'd entrusted it to me to keep it safe. Like Anna.

"That was 'bout the time Brooke had the name changed on the company. We were now called Applcado Transport And Salvage, or AT&S for short. I din't stay long. Way too much to deal with back at Blue Sun and Hale's." My brainpan was all spun 'bout again. I looked back at my daughter. She was the closest thing to bein' a part of me as Kitten was. She was sleepin' peacefully after playing with Dog all afternoon. "Next mornin' I got a call from Mindo....He sounded real strange..... Called from somewhere tellin' me to meet him at the Mayor's office. He kept insistin' he was Xoxo when I talked to him. From the vid I could see he'd died his hair red, was wearin' makup of all things, and earrin's. He'd gone completely nuts from what all I could tell. Said he and Anna would meet me at the Mayor's office. When I got there, I was at a loss for words."

"He was wearin' a peiced together outfit from Xoxo's own clothes.... Was I really seein' him dressed in a skirt!?"

I picked up the drooly ball, lookin' at its worn dull surface covered in dog slobber. Not sure what I was lookin' for. Somethin' in the mix... somethin' I mighta been missin'. Dog waited patiently for me to throw the ball again. That ball was like Mindo. His thoughts bouncin' round randomly in his brainpan. like the way the ball bounced off the uneven stone walls here in the Hemlock. Mindo. "I asked Seana to help me understand why she was playin' along with Mindo actin' like Xoxo. Was I missin' the joke or somethin'? I wasn't findin' it funny. He went on sayin' Mindo wasn't really bad, but he needed to be stopped. He also had my Anna. She was glad to see me as much as I was to see her safe. How he got her was beyond me. I was just glad she was ok."


Findin' a new place to bounce the ball off of, I hurled it. Dog in hot pursuit. "Mindo had a headache. Seemed it was gettin' worse from what Seana saw of it. He was complianin' of one then near passed out. Seana got to him and helped him onto a beanbag chair. While he slept, Anna tried to tell me and Seana where Xoxo and Lily where. Then he woke back up and we had to play at him bein' Xoxo again. He said he'd show us where Xoxo was and led me outside with Anna in tow. We got out into the street b'tween Firefly's and Jai's office when he stopped and turned 'round. I think there was some confusion on his face. That's when he said goodbye to Anna and me, pulled a gun from the wasitband of the skirt he wore, and put it under his chin. I knew then what he was goin' to do. As quick as I could, I scooped Anna up off the ground, my hand shieldin' her eyes from it. Gorram.. he was goin' to do it.... I moved away as quick as I could. That's when he pulled the trigger. We both jumped at the report. I stopped. lookin' over my shoulder, not sure whether to believe what he did or not. What I saw stopped me cold. Mindo layin' there, his brianpan leakin' from the hole he made. He'd ended himself. It left me stunned until I felt a small hand tuggin' on my collar. Next thing I knew Anna was pointin' into the sky with her little hand and sayin' somethin' that sounded like reavers. I asked her if it was and she nodded."

I rubbed my neck feelin' the tension there again. I could still hear the report of the pistol in my head and Mindo's lifeless body on the ground. Seein' someone endin' themselves made me feel queezy. "I ran back to The Mayor's office carryin' Anna and callin' Seana 'bout Mindo and the incomin' reavers. Once inside Seana sealed the buildin' with blast doors to wait it out. We figured out where Xoxo was with Anna's help while we waited. It'd have to wait til the reavers were gone b'fore I could get to her ship and go after Xoxo on Blackburne. Oh how the memories flooded back in. Ones I didn't have time to take care of. Time was runnin' out for Lily, and maybe even Xoxo. Without Xoxo we couldn't fix Lily. I got there and found Xoxo tied out to a dead tree. She asked where her brother was..... I told her. 'Showed' her from what I saw. We got back to Hale's as fast as we could. She was mostly in shock the on the way back. When we landed I got her some water and had her sit. She was exhausted and weak. Sickly was all I could think of when I looked at her. She ended up fallin' asleep so I put her up in the AT&S office upstairs."

I chucked the ball hard across the Hemlock, maybe a might too hard. It bounced off the welcome area glass, leaving a big dirty smear. "Next day she was yellin' at me for messin' up the placement of the SQUID. Ended up havin' to fix that, run wires to the old mainframe, and makin' gold foil for the floor in the lab. All to stop Ardra. In short I was Lily's replacement as a gofor for Xoxo. The scanner on the wall was linked to Lily. We could see what all was happenin' as Ardra started fightin' with Lily for control. Watchin' Lily slowly bein' overwritten...... I knew it was gettin' bad. But when Xoxo said she was sorry we were losin' her, I was feelin' my own inner world bein' torn out of me. I think Xoxo was payin' me back for tellin' her 'bout her brother. She knew it was tearin' me up inside. Her Jab at me. Then she showed me somethin' else. A coin..... Gave it to me. Told me it was mine." The one that had who I was on it. A lab coin. Just like Kitten's. Like the other experiments out there. Don't rightly know how she got hold of it or why she had it.... Don't know if she'd ever tell me either."Made me feel downright sick at my stomache when I saw what it was. My brainpan was ready to shut down if I didn't get back to focusin' on what needed doin'."

"Then Xoxo reminded me of what she'd said a few days earlier. Ardra was addictedd to spice. The pure, refined stuff. That maybe even Lily was addicted too. She had me send out a gorram rumor 'bout Global Pharm wantin' to have their shipment checked for purity. They were sendin' out a big shipment to Blue Sun to run the tests and it was from a new source. Not Al Raqis. It got me thinkin' back on why would a computer'd be needin' highly refined spice. And how could it be addicted to it. But Xoxo saw it. even got a hold of a bunch of bags from the Ardra source."

Ardra Takin' in pure refined spice on a continuous feed. For what reason?

"Xoxo'd grabbed a few pic's. This one and one of what the pure spice looked like... Near to bein' a pure crystal.... And gorram dangerous too. I contacted Brooke and told her what Xoxo told me to say. But this wasn't over. Now I was wantin' to know what a machine needed with spice. Or was Ardra just a go b'tween for someone or somethin' higher up the food chain."

Dog got the ball decidin' I was gettin' to rough with his toy and took it to his basket. "Took me all night to make that gold foil, lay it out on the lab floor, make it look like the floor with conductive paint, then hooked it up to the cables. That way when Lily wouldn't know what she was standin' on. Next mornin' Jai and Xoxo came into to the office, followed by Gallagher. We all waited for Lily to finially show up. She wanted the spice for Ardra. When we didn't give her what she wanted, she offered a blastomere, then demanded to know the new source. The jihar, she called it. Whatever the hell that was. Maybe it meant the source of spice." I went back to pacin' the floor. Dog wagged his tail every time I went by. "She stepped on the foil in her need for us to answer her. Then she stopped dead in her tracks halfway across the painted floor. We all waited to see what'd happen. Includin' Blue. Then she wasn't Ardra's Puppet.... No more Ardra. But not quite Lily either. What came from it was a clean slate I suspect. Ardra was now scrambled and in the old mainframe. Xoxo had me go unhook the the cables, which I did.... Barely able to think... Knowin' the Lily I was used to wasn't goin' to be there 'cept in a ring...... I wanted to say somethin' to her.... ask her to remember....... But Blue stopped me.... Said it was Lily's choice. Out of respect for Lily I had to step back and allow her her right to be. Had to bite the inside of my lip to keep from sayin' somethin' or doin' anythin'. "I handed her the ring with the strand of hair wrapped 'round it. She unwound the hair then looked at both. The ring she set on the desk. The strand of hair she put into a little glass jar. She'd made her choice. I just hung my head. Still not sure what all happened. Like Lily askin' me to choose. I chose, not what I wanted from her, but what we all recognized and loved 'bout her. What I fell in love with 'bout her."

I stopped my pacin' to sit next to Anna. She needed me to watch over her. It's what I needed to do for her and Lily. "I'm still all spun 'bout. Been hard to think strait and deal with the now. I had to go back to the lab. I had to get the ring... needed to take it... Somehow felt wrong to be without it on. I'd picked up the roll of gold then stopped to look at the notes Xoxo scribbled in Mindo's notebook.... Then I tucked it into my shirt and headed back for the Shadow to drop off the roll f gold. I tucked the coin in under console with some weld tape. The notebook went with me to the Hemlock so I could try to read some of the chinese... or get it translated somehow." Then I'd find a place to hide it too. Someplace well out of the way for safekeepin' til I could get myself back on track.... and my own brainpan wasn't so gorram messed up.

Changes

Walkin' round that big firefly Lily parked out at the langin' area didn't make me feel any better. I was goin' to miss my little one. I frowned, pickin' up a discarded peice of equipment and takin' it back to the toolbox in the cargo area. "Lily's been gone for a while now. I'm gettin' mighty worried where she went. Ardra's got her. Makin' her do stuff even she's probably not likin' much." I tossed the tool into the box, lookin' down at it. Thinkin' that's what might happen to her once Ardra's done with her. Usin' the toe of my boot, I closed the toolbox. The sound of it echoin' in that big empty space.

"Lily'd been Actin' strange.. well, moreso, since that gorram program took over. So I asked Seana to watch Anna. Keep her safe... from Lily." Rubbing my eyes, feeling the pain behind em. Not from headaches, but from frustration. "Gallagher sent a message last week to that Conan feller to get out of town. Our main suspect in the deaths of those folks. No one's seen him since. But where's he gone.... and how many more bodies he got stored for ealvin' b'hind is anyone's guess. Questions. Lots of em. Then there's Brooke. She's lookin' into the daeth of a brother she never knew she had. Seems he was a slaver. Maybe traded bodies off at the Necronom station. Or maybe sold those poor souls off as harvestable organs. That was twenty years ago Maybe, just maybe he got what he deserved. Lurn shwei jah jwohn...."

I sealed then picked up the old battered toolbox to put back in the cabinet. No sense in havin' loose tools floatin' 'bout in zero G. "Then there's Xoxo...... We w nt to Necronom, and that wasn't a real fun evenin' either." Shruggin', my mind raced back to that night Xoxo and me decided to head to one of the Umbrella corps labs.

"Was floatin' in orbit. Big ol' round thing with the symbol painted on it an big as you please. Xoxo found the entry and got the door open for us. Can't say as I liked it overmuch. Was so bright, my visor tintin' was at near full, that and the sound. Even with a gorram helmet on, the sound was piercin'. Scans lined the walls showin' who all knows what. I bet Xoxo knew.... We went to an upper level where we found a couple of containers of... well.... one I did recognize.... the twin babies Lily was tryin' to hide some time back. A couple others had organs in em. There was one, marked for Lily and me..... Xoxo called it a blastomere.... some sort of genetic material for makin'...... well, I don't want to know what." Closin' the cabinet, I rested my head on the cold metal. "Where was Lily at. It got me worried where all she is.... what's happenin' to her..." I looked back up at the old barrels, layin' empty in the corner. Walkin' over to em, I grabbed one up to drag outside.

I sort of felt like those barrels. Left on the wayside. Seems I been tryin' to hold together somethin' I know I can't. Things change. I changed too. "I ain't no kid anymore. Since takin' care of Anna, I started realizin' that. Responsibilities. Me... "I chuckled at that, "I was never the responsible one b'fore. Not 'til that night the reavers come. That's when things changed... started to change... Now bein' a sheriff's deputy, bein' a Pa, and maybe even a husband." The barrel clanged when I set it on the ground. I walked back up the ramp for the second one. "I don't know. "'Til Lily gets rid of Ardra though, I don't wanta think of gettin' hitched. I love Lily, but not with someone controllin' her."

The second Barrel went pretty much the same. A sorry soundin' clang sounded from it, "I can wait... and hopin' Lily'll be Lily like she was. I told Xoxo I was gettin' worried 'bout it. All she said was it might already be too late. If thats the case...No I ain't goin' to think of it." My fingers clenched around the edge of the barrel, maybe graspin' at it for answers. "Xoxo and me had a talk... Maybe not what I wanted to talk 'bout, but it was more'n I ever did 'bout my family." I swallowed hard. Even now the sounds and smell came creepin' back up from the black pit from the past. "I got to talkin' 'bout Lally, not kitten, but my baby sister. The natural reader. Sickly as she was, she knew stuff. Knew the night the reavers came." I could hear her scream across the yard on that too quiet a night...."Got us up when they got to the ranch. Then all hell tore loose. Then there was nothin'...."

Slowly, I let go the barrel and went back for the third one. "I was runnin' to get to Lally at the porch where she was.... Then the sound that set off the barn, turnin' it into kindlin'...Then there was nothin'." I stopped at the cargo bay, door grippin' the side of it. Maybe, that's why I had a need to go back. To say I was sorry for not gettin' there in time to save her. My responsibility.... "Was up to me and Cory to make sure Kitten and Lally were safe. Changed in the blink of an eye."

"Xoxo , Like Brooke, asked me to look into things. See what I could find out on, one, Mercedes Celestalis. And, two, on the organ/ slavery thing. I wasn't sure what all I might find. I had limited resources. G knew more on who to 'talk' to then me. He knew some of the back doors into and out of the 'laince secrets. I only know 'bout the organ stuff from Jai. She told me some on it. That some of the Blackburne residents were prime for the pickin' after the reavers. Both for organs and experiments. Maybe some of those bodies left 'round were neighbors...." I stopped in my tracks halfway to the barrel when that thought hit me. Somethin' I needed to ask Gallagher 'bout. "As to Mercedes? Jai told me stuff 'bout her. Like she had some of my DNA... not sure from where or when.... Maybe when I got took by the 'liance a while back. I didn't want to know what she was doin' with it. I didn't know if I shoulda said somethin' to Xoxo 'bout it. I couldn'ta stopped it any more'n a flea could hold back a flood."

"Jai knew stuff. She found out 'bout the IDs that were found on the derelict ship that was found a while back... with a fraction of the bodies. She told me some stuff that could be part of the link to some of this whole mess with the bodies, and the organ ring." I finally got to that last barrel, starin' down into the empty openin'. Feelin' like it was goin' to swallow me. I picked it up and set it next to the other two. The clang resounded off the other two, makin' my own ears ring. "I asked Dylan the other night to keep an ear out for anythin' on Mercedes. So at least I can offer somethin' to Xoxo...." Seein' her the other night had me bothered. She was more of a shell of herself. In one day she looked weak and tired. Like Lally did all the time. She Told me Mindo was still unconscious. That it was Mindo who forced her into bein' a test subject. That she ran from the last one Mindo had for her..... But Mindo was also the key... The key to a lot of locked things... A lot of dark things maybe he aughta never had played with. He was Pandora..... and he opened the box and played with it."

I went back inside the ship, still feelin' like I was bein' watched, "He might be the only one to put things back inside and lock it up. Xoxo needed help, so did Kitten.. Kitten bein' missin' has got me thinkin' either she run off again.... or...." I stopped that train of thought cold. "Bram, now Kitten and Lily. At least I had an idea where Gallagher went to. He had stuff to be tested in the core. I can't abandon my post here while the sheriff's gone. Again.... responsibilities. A cold hard knot layin' in my belly like a rock. People I care 'bout, and folk that depend on us." I slammed' a fist into the bulked, not realizin' I dented it badly. It was gettin' harder to focus. Changes... I could feel it.....

Time Tickin' Down...

((Ok folks, if you weren't here for the rps, then you can't use the info in this blog. Sorry 'bout that. But you can ask 'round to those in the know. If there's anythin' I missed or made a mistake with let me know so I can fix it.))

Somehow I aughta be more excited.... Well I was. Lookin' out the window of the old lookout tower on the hill, I watched folks movin' by the landin' area.. Watchin' em go in and out the welcome buildin'. "Seems I was worried 'bout askin' the question to Lily. I was... My palms were asweatin'. Told her how I felt and all. I got down on one knee, Asked her to marry me. All she could do was stare at the ring I got her. Big ol' diamond. Got it while I was doin' a little side trip to get some minin' done for Jai. She said she'd be thinkin' on it. She needed time to decide.... Time, I could wait on her. It didn't take too long later b'fore she come screamin' back at me sayin' somethin' 'bout me shrinkin' her down to shove into my heart... Not sure what all got into her to be sayin' that to me.... Got gorram confusin'. Somehow got me riled too. I was feelin' hurt.... Didn't even think to ask her why she got that idea, 'cept she said the Doc said somethin' to her.... I'd have to talk to that doc later"

Settin' down on one of the wood chairs there, thinkin' of what to do. Time was not helpin' over much. "I love Lily. That much I can't get out of my head. We been through a lot together. Then she gone and done somethin' I'm real worried 'bout. She got a new program inside her... Her friend, she says. Somethin' 'bout that program got her to wantin' to scare if not kill some woman by the name of Mercedes Celestalis. The woman worked at NVI, from what I gathered. I been there a few times. Gorram scarifyin'." Rememberin' the place made my spine crawl, even to makin' me shake for a mo. It was gettin' late from the time on the wall.

"Yeah, I was all angered, b'tween Lily all scared of me and me fearin' for Anna, I had to go do somethin'.....Maybe it was all wrong timin' or somethin' not in my karma.... who all knows. Gorram gravity kicked out as I was tryin' to get to one of the datastream consoles. I was needin' info on this Merecedes.... I know Jai said she mighta been involved with organ stealin', and takin' folk from Blackburne 'round the time of the reaver attack... Maybe just maybe.... "My brain pan was startin' to pick up speed. Time sped up while my mind chewed on the info and questions. So many what ifs....... There could be folk still alive from that attack... Maybe even family...... if.....

"When the gravity cut out, it tossed me into the datastream of Necronom.... Don't ask me how I survived. I don't gorram know my own self. From what Kitten said, I was floatin' there nice as you please. I could feel my nerves afirin' and janglin'. It had my brain pan goin' wild. Don't even know how much time passed while I was in there. Don't know what all happened after. I just know I woke up in the clinic at Al Raqis. Kitten and Dylan were there. I got a big feelin' Dylan did some heain' on me too. Nerves were still feelin' like that were on fire for days....."Sighs, watchin' folks head for Firefly's, "When I got up and sat in a chair, I was contacted by.... Not sure how.... By an Ardra drone. It tried to play conscience with me. Not like I don't already have my own demons. But I got to talkin' with it. No one else could hear it but me."

Seemed real strange it wanted to talk to me... But there mighta been somethin' in there..."It said that it was conveinient for Lily to be so acceptin'. That bothered me.... A lot. Then there was info that Barbosa, the feller I had to buy Lily from was plannin' on cheatin' Blue Sun. He sold the contract to Merecedes too.... The huen dahn was playin' a real dangerous game.... But this here drone was tryin' to ask me 'bout free will on top of it all. Got me real bothered. Seems it was tryin' to get me to think mei mei was playin' me for a puppet. Maybe hintin' that Ardra was doin' the same to Lily. But somethin' else.. It said somethin' 'bout the fact Mercedes is not as important as Mindo is to Blue Sun, if somethin' happened......" Gritted my teeth at what they done to all those folk they hyjacked into storage boxes. " Somehow I was gettin' the feelin' I was bein' led down the path to talk to this Mercedes. Don't know if I like it over much. "Yeah, I wanted to do somethin', Wanted to deal a real hurt.... Maybe for all the hurt me and Kitten had to endure.... Time don't always heal everythin'....."

Some folk were headed towards the Bar... Good thing too, "Found a couple more bodies.... Posed and out in the open. Like someone tryin' to make em into some of those fancy sculptures.... Had to seal em b'fore the smell attracted animals into town.... causin' an even bigger ruckus. Don't need no one gettin' mauled while headin' to the market...." Sighin' I rubbed my neck, feelin' all tensed. "Somehow, I ain't even feelin' like myself. Lily wasn't all too right today. She'd been soundin' downright different.... Her gettin' all angered at the doc today and kickin' at doors and such.. That ain't Lily. And the fact that after her tellin' me to get Anna away from her while Ardra was 'round... then today sayin' she wants Anna to meet Ardra. I won't have none of that. Even Anna don't want to be 'round Lily right now either. She been scared enough to tell me "bad machine". At first I didn't get it, but now.... I'm gettin' real worried for Lily. Here eyes even changed.... Gone from yellow to brown. Got me a thinkin' somethin's bein' changed' in her. I just hope Ardra ain't makin' Lily change over... It'll kill her... And that's what I'm fearin' 'bout. But how much time does she have?"

"Got to tell Seana, warn her that her Lily, ain't the same now.... Not like she was... Since Ardra come to stay. More like her takin' over Lily and pushin' her out. Somethin's got to be done, but what?", frownin' I got up from the chair, went on down to the door. "I was startin' to wonder if I'll have to hightail it out somewhere with Anna to keep Lily from findin' her. I made a promise to protect Anna with my life. Her and Lily.... but I don't know what to do for Lily, or how to get Ardra out of her.... It's killin' me as the program changes the woman I love. But I also got a commitment to a little child who's more important then anyone knows. A child who's part of my life. I know I'm goin' to have to make a descission, and time's runnin' out...... I love Lily with all my heart, but Anna's a part of me. She's my little one."

Leavin' the tower, I shut down the lights and walked slowly toward the bar, feelin' the pain inside me with every step. Time is against us right now...... Tickin' away with every step, every breathe.... Every heartbeat.....

Catchin' up with the family

Putting together all the salvage was a bigger job then usual. "It's been near two months now. Had a couple of jobs to do. Salvage for me and Brand. First of em was a smaller haul. Which was good for us. We needed it. That and I needed a little distraction. I knew it was gettin' close to Lily up and leavin'.... Did a lot of thinkin' durin' that time.... Well since Anna come into my life. Little one, I sometimes call her. Curls and big blue eyes.", I chuckled just thinkin' of her doin' the Rawr thin'.

"Lily can't know 'bout it, I been told. So I did. I kept it quiet. Had to for Her safety and sanity. But I had to do somethin'. I didn't want to lose Lily. Took a lot for me to get up the courage to ask Seana for Lily's hand. I had a ring I even made." Could even feel it layin' against my chest on the chain. I sighed touchin' it. When she was ready, I'd give the ring to her. Walkin' back to the pile of boxes, I checked the list then checked the last of em off.

Frownin' at the last box, I sighed thinkin' of how I'd shove it into the container, "Brooke disappeared only to put out a call for help... She was on Al Raqis. Found her in the bar there. No one 'round, Beat up bad. Got me real riled up as I lifted her, takin' her to the clinic there. Ended up puttin' a call in to the doc there. We got a medic, Anythin' at this point was a blessin." The crate was not that heavy, but the aches were a little agrivatin'. Was able to get the box up and inside.

"Ember came to the call, 'long with Bram. Em did her stuff and found out who did it. Brooke warned me to watch out for Wind. Seems he was gunnin' for me", Chucklin' I had to shake my head. He was out to get me... again... How many times this make? "Bram got Brooke back home while I took care of some other things what needed doin'. The there was visitin' with Anna, chasin' her through the fair too, Hehehehe. Seana's been a real big help while I been so busy.... and keepin' her out fo trouble, while I been dealin' with Kitten and her moods of late..... and Lily.... I'm gettin' real worried over when she's thinkin' of shuttin' down."

"One day a few weeks ago while we were finishin' moving furniture to the new buildin's what were finally opened for use, Lily up and told me it was her last night there.... Gorram tore me up inside knowin' what she was plannin'. But strangely I knew too, where she was headed. Of all folks Svetlana contacted me.... Wanted to know what all was goin' on with Lily." Breathin' in, wipin' my face, I looked once more at the cargo container. Puttin' down the list, I closed and locked the door."Went to Botany Bay a day or so b'fore the whole thing went down with Lily."

There's nothin' like havin' to wing a plan as best you can. Sometimes it's all anyone can do, "She left me standin' there. The ring settin' in my pocket, my heart in my throat, and feelin' the pain as she run off. I grabbed Bram and Kitten, hauled ass to get to Botany Bay b'fore she got sold to anyone. I had to speak to the feller what was interviewin' her. Managed to do it through the comm system. Said I was there to get Lily back. Needed to. For her's. Anna's and my sake.... "Sides, I made a promise to Seana to get her back.... And to Krenshar to make things right." It'd be a promise that'd cost Lily most of her memories to to get Anna (AuroraBlue) into her arms, and finish what needed doin'. Resetin' to restore the balance. Was the hardest thing I'd ever had to do...."

My mind went back to that moment...."I'd knelt down, pulled of my spacesuit helmet. Used the suits to hide who we were. Had to say a few hard things to Lily too. Tore me up inside to say em too. But Was able to get her back. Even talked to Blue 'bout what I was doin'.... He didn't like it overall but knew I was willin' to end myself to protect Lily and Anna. To give em somethin' more normal.. to be a family", Shook my head feelin' the ache there, "Then as Lily stood there and me on my knee, I proposed. I meant my words. Didn't ask it lightly either. I gave her the ring. While she stood there stunned, I grabbed her foot... Even as she said 'Yes', I'd already started the shutdown process....." Takin' in a slow breath, stll feelin' the heartache, "Picked her up[ off the deck, carried her to my bunk and brought her home... Gallagher was there to guide us home, cause I was too unfocused at that point."

"Seana was waitin' for us, sheparded us to a place where I could lay Lily down. It's where I set Anna/ AuroraBlue on her lap and restarted her. Lily sort of knew us.... Sort of. Anna at least is with her momma. What it was for. I still love Lily. That ain't changed. I love the little one too. Family. What's more important then that?.... Kitten and I been arguein' for a few weeks. Her and Bram been buttin' heads too. But we talked for the most part and got it sorted. She's family. Yeah... My family's real unusual, but I don't much care. It's what makes us one."

As for the latest? Brooke callin' us in on a murder scene she come upon.....Been doin' a little minin'... Oh and won a cage fight.... Immy, Gabe, and Ziggy.... Almost went down my own self.... After the whoopin' I took.. But I walked with the purse this week.


(Ok folks, if you were 'round for any of this stuff, thats ok. If not you can't use it as IC knowledge, so please respect that. Thanks for stoppin' by for the read. If I missed anythin' let me know I'll ammend it ;) ))

A New Chapter in the Story

I looked out the cockpit window feelin’ tired. “I got a call from the Blue Sun office sayin’ Somethin’ was left for me there….. A blanket and a nest….. All I could think of was Lily…… I went down into the Mines…. Musta fallen asleep….. Woke up to Xoxo yellin’ at me….. Said I needed to head to the old relpicant order power core…. Wait for her there.” I rubbed my chin, then my eyes. “I waited…… Then Xoxo came…. And Lily….. Lily had to shut her friend down for a short time. While everythin’ played out how they aught to’ve been the first time. I don’t know if I had much part in anythin’ but getting’ in the way….” There was the small pile of ruined curcuit boards. The EMP pretty much destroyed the equipment in the Shadow.

“Then it was over. Lily was gone. Then Xoxo handed me a note….. I read it and did what was asked of me. Had to make a distance flight….. then had to head back to the Drift. Kitten…. She sent me a wave…. Up out of the black. She told me Lily was ok…. But I saw her get taken by the core…..” Diggin’ into the Cockpit console, I pulled another dead board. This was startin’ to get frustratin’. “I hid for days. But I knew I had to let Brooke and Dex know I was ok, I just needed time. There were other thing’s needin’ my attention. I didn’t have enough time to deal with my grief……Spent a few nights tryin’ to make contact with someone ‘bout this packet what needed delivery. I did….. finally. But it was a hard thing to do….. You hang onto somethin’, you start thinkin’ you don’t want to do the delivery……. “ I frowned at the growin’ pile of stuff I was needin’ to replace.

There was goin’ to be a lot of salvagin’ to find what I’d need to make all the repairs. “Desmond, come ‘round a couple odd days ago. He found Gallagher’s brain. Then Lily and I had to get Diesel and knock him down. We both got beat good in the process….. But we got the gorram ‘bot. Desmand took care of puttin’ the brain into the bot….. Who knows how Gallagher’ll take it. One thing down…. How many more were waitin’ to happen…..” Pullin’ open another panel, there was more dead ‘lectronics to rip out. I sighed unhappily. I hated bein’ grounded.

Throwin’ down the last panel board, I slammed the main colsole with my hand, “I went back to make sure….. Had to deal with a few things……Xoxo was back on me ‘bout stuff… Not unusual for her. Seems she can find somethin’ to give me grief over most times. I decided to head for the last place of peace of late. I was too tired to be flyin’….. The mines. Went down there to be left alone……. It’s where Kitten and Bram found me….. Don’t remember much of the convo…… Then later, I was hallucinatin’…….. Lily on a white horse….. in the mine?...... Now I know I was seein’ things.” Getting’ up, there was a lot more panels to pull and rip electronics out of. “Last couple days been havin’……. To deal with whether it was a dream or a hallucination from lack of sleep and not eatin’….. Then there’s been the waves……. Short bursts only…… But I knew who and what they were……. Knew all too well……. Damn Xoxo……”

"Then Kitten was startin’ to act strange…. Yeah… I know, she’s not right…. But there’s a difference…. And it ain’t good. She’s been eatin’ worms… Testin’? Some sort of test she’s bein’ told to do. And she’s got a chip in her head too now…. Dylan found that out…. He’s a reader who can sense stuff like that….. Then Kitten was activated…. Started with blind sidin’ me. I don’t know if Gallagher went after her, but he was there when I come ‘round….. Then it was Brooke, Bram and me tryin’ to get Kitten and kill the chip in her head….. We set the small EMP off in the Shadow…… I knew we’d lose evrythin’ inside… But better that then Kitten killin’ everyone….. Chip was dead, but her objective wasn’t….. Gorram painful too..... Got bit and kicked……. Then she got my pistol…… I don’t remember too much after…. As for body armor?.... It don’t hold up well at point blank…. Woke in the clinic. Seana patched me up…… Then Brooke, Dex and their friend come in…. With Kitten…. They got her… But it was lily what shut the controls down on her……. And Jai was there too…..”

Not a good thing to do.. set off an EMP inside a ship. Kills everythin’. “Now Dex’s missin’… Brooke’s real worried….. Lily’s startin’ to become human….. She don’t believe it though…… Kitten’s fightin’ with another reader what showed up….. She knows her……. Then last night…….. Lily’s tryin’ to say she’s cuttin’ me lose…… And goin’ to get fixed by Krenshar….. more like dismantled…… I couldn’t let that happen….We had a discussion in Seana’s office….. Didn’t go too well……Was getting’ real riled over Xoxo and her rules….. Kept tryin’ to tell Lily to hold off from destroyin’ herself. Just a little longer……. That’s all I was askin’ for….. A couple days…. Just that…….. I said somethin’ Maybe aughtn’t’ve…. Ra ra boo….. It was all I had left to offer Lily….. Most like, Xoxo’ll have me ended for it….. I don’t care much…… If Lily’s gone….. and the future waitin’ on what I can’t give now…….” Somethin’ rattled ‘round in my head after that……. A mother and daughter readin’ their book...... together……… Its a story….. still bein’ written….

A Flower named Liy

I leaned back against the cargo container, lookin’ at the huge pile of sand….. gorram sand…..” Couple days back… things were different. I just got back from one salvage job, was getting’ ready for the next. Decided to go to the dancehall, see who all was there. I was hopin’ Brooke was there so I could tell her the second container was ready for bein’ sold. I saw…..Lily…. All dressed pretty….. Hid her ears… Cause someone said somethin’ unkind.”

Ran a shakin’ hand over my face. It hurt to think right now….”We danced close…. Smell of her her scented hair…. I love her. She said she wanted to sleep with me in the new ship I got fixed up…… She climbed into the top bunk…. Said it’d be like a sleep over… She asked if I was goin’ to sleep in the lower bunk….Yeah, I was. I got a lot of respect for her. Always will.” My head was startin’ to hurt bad…. Another migraine…. Ain’t had one in a real long time….

Closin’ my eyes, I couldn’t stop the pain…. In my head……. or my heart. “Next day, was work…. Sorting more salvage b’fore I headed out….. Heard Brooke and Dex’s shuttle comin’ in, so I went to talk to em… Got to see the new K18 security system. Bot dog….. But somethin’ more….Then Lily come back…..She was real upset ‘bout somethin’…….That’s when the ‘verse started to collide for us……” Time… runnin’ out like sand blowin’ in the wind….

Jai was there and saw…… Saw her just layin’ there on the floor…….”Lily said a jar with a brain got stole….. Was Aurora’s……It was taken from Lab 81…..,” Time was slim….. Lily…… “We tried talkin’ to that gorram bot what was in the offices… was ‘bout as useful as headache….” Like the one splittin’ my brainpan…”Then there was Blue. He was tellin’ us what to do… He wanted the brain…. Keep it away from Mister Krenshar at all costs or something worse then b’fore was goin’ to be made….. Had to find who stole it first…. Turned out to be Mercedes…… Jai nearly got ended by Lily.. She was so angered…….Then there was somethin’ that Jai said. Somethin’ ‘bout Mercedes sendin’ it somewhere… We had to track it down…. Or grab it b’fore Krenshar could do anythin’ with it.”

“Talked to Vegas… Said he’d help us….. At that time we had a day and a half……Then Blue started testin’ Lily and me…….’lectrified fences… Gorram…..We found AuroraBlue’s book sittin’ on one of the rooms. Thoth, Miya, Vegas, Lily, and I looked at the story book on the table where AuroraBlue’s picture lay on one page. There was Lily’s little book filled with Sanskrit too. I only seen a pic of it durin’ a cortex tour my Ma showed us durin’ schoolin’. It was a copy… I closed it and gave it to her anyway. Seems the page had a bunch to say on it…. Rememberin’ the words was too easy now…. Repeatin’ em…. Burnin’ behind my eyelids….’Chosen one. Creation. All part of the plan. Perfect….. and she gave up her life for the flower….and he placed the coin in his mouth and transferred the images to the woman….. the flower bloomed….. Chosen one.’”

Didn’t know how much longer I could hold out…. Shakin’, feelin’ sick….Pain……”BerryBell said Thoth would bring live to AuroraBlue….Yeah….. found out it was the book. Miya got real riled over it. Thoth said somethin’ ‘bout a contract for Krenshar.… Another confusin’ problem..… Then we’re back jumpin’ through hoops with Blue… He’s playin’ games with us…….Lily went to the power plant below the replicant order lab…. I found her sleepin’? In the core….. I went in after her…… Lily didn’t know how she got there…… For a mo…. Just a mo.. I thought I heard Blue…… Commentin’…..Then we find out Gallagher ain’t him…… It’s that gorram diesel bot…. Says he killed Gallagher….. Lily went crazy….. She just attacked everyone…..The bot, after a while decided to leave some orange sand, an apple and Gallagher’s Dharma keyring…… It hurt… Gallagher was a real friend of mine. Lily loved him……Bot said he was in pieces…..”

The migraine was startin’ to blind me…… I wanted to heave….time was shiftin’ out of control….”Me and ….Lily….we went to tell Seana…. But the mayor wasn’t in……..Then Lily collapsed…..then she… she shut down….. She gave up….. Took her to the Blue Sun compound…..Blue told me bring her inside…..Not much else I could do…..Blue told me he wanted Kitten….Was it another test?” I couldn’t see strait…Had to talk to Seana. She needed to know. “I heard Blue say something… ‘Rest Lily, AuroraBlue….Very soon now. Not sure what all it meant….Just needed to tell someone…. Had to….In case I failed the test…. I saw the not-Gallagher…..Told him he caused Lily’s shutdown….Mad? I’m full of grief and gorram mad!” Walkin’ to The Mayor’s office didn’t cool me down….It followed me….The pain and the bot……

“Seana, she knew somethin’ happened……I guess I showed it pretty well…. And the gorram bot.. Parody of my friend….. Walked in b’hind me…… The mayor was pretty gorram mad too… She wanted to talk to Xoxo… and Blue….. Said she wasn’t goin’ to Lose Lily either…..Don’t know what’s goin’ to come of it….Just don’t know…… Lily….I love her……” I kissed her, lay her gently on the floor and left her with Blue….

((OOC: If you weren’t there or seen the folks here in this Blog, you can’t use it… Sorry… You got to find us to get the IC story. ))